The Latte Boy
by HoratiosBabyMama
Summary: Duncan goes into a cafe to get Courtney her daily coffee fix and meets a barista who needs to work on his customer service.


**I tried writing something productive. Yeah, that worked well.**

**-:-**

"Duncan! Get me my latte! We're going to be late!"

I growled as I marched into the coffee shop while my girlfriend stood outside, yelling at some poor soul on her cell phone. Why'd she need a freaking coffee if we were late anyway? Couldn't she just grab coffee at the office? But no, she hated the chain in her building's lobby, only a drink from this café, _Mugs not Drugs_, would do.

Personally, I did like the name, Courtney thought it was stupid but said they had the best latte in the city. It made me wonder how a prep like her had found this place, it definitely wasn't her scene. The walls were a lurid purple that matched the dark wood paneling while the ceiling tiles were each painted by a local artist, giving it a cool mural effect. The disco ball was a nice touch too. The customers were just as unique as the décor, artists, hippies and punks occupied almost every seat in the place while some song blasted from the speakers. I recognized it as one of the local bands that I loved. Seriously, how had straight-laced Courtney discovered this place?

I shook my head and walked up to the counter where the barista was refilling one of the machines with water.

"Hey, can I get a latte? The ball and chain is in a hurry," I drummed my fingers against the table. The barista snorted and didn't face me, still working on his task.

"Sorry, I serve drinks with extra whip; I don't serve whipped guys,"

I grit my teeth and it took all my willpower not to jump over the counter and pummel this guy.

"What'd you say?"

He put down the now-empty jug and turned to me, pushing white strands out of slanted eyes.

"I said, your girlfriend can come in and get her own drink so that you can keep what's left of your dignity."

"Shut up and get me the damn latte," we glared at each other, my face set in a frown, his in a smirk.

"Right away, with extra whip and a shot of intelligence?" he walked away before I could grab him.

"Sure, if you give yourself a shot of goddamn respect!" I snapped at his back. He just chuckled in reply.

I crossed my arms and looked towards the window as I waited; Courtney stared at me and pointed to her watch, looking agitated. I sighed and studied the paintings on the ceiling.

"Alright, one latte, extra whipped and a black coffee with a shot of red bull," the barista placed the two cups in front of me and smiled, almost looking apologetic.

"I didn't order that," I said, but took the drink, placing the money for the latte down and reaching for my wallet. He held out a hand.

"On the house, if you're dating someone you refer to as the ball and chain, you need all the energy you can get," he gave me a knowing look and I snorted, shaking my head.

"Thanks dude," I grabbed Courtney's latte and hurried out the door.

"About time! Now let's go, I want you to meet my boss!" Courtney snatched her coffee from me and took off, I followed begrudgingly, this red bull would come in handy.

-:-

"Latte, extra whipped?" I glared at that smirk as I once again found myself in _Mugs not Drugs_, while Courtney waited outside, yelling at her assistant on that damn phone.

"Shut up, put chocolate in it this time, she's PMSing like a bitch. And give me…the brownie special? Is that what I think it is?" my gaze lowered from the menu to see the Asian's smirk widen.

"A pot brownie ice cream shake? Yep," he smoothed out his Metallica t-shirt and fixed his apron.

"I'll definitely take that," I nodded, smiling approvingly. I bet Courtney would be appalled if she found out her fave café served stuff like that.

"Not hanging with the girlfriend all day I take it?" he asked as he went to fill my order.

"Nah, just taking her to work," I shrugged my shoulder towards the window where you could see my bike parked outside. Courtney was leaning against it, jabbering into her cell phone still. That phone got more action than me I swear.

"Cool, I recommend enjoying this in the park then, on a pretty day like this. Wish I could do that," the barista sighed as he set the latte in front of me before going to put ice cream and some brownie chunks in the blender.

"Join me during your break then," I chuckled, leaning against the counter. He only smirked in response before turning on the blender.

"That'll be $3.50,"

I paid him and took a tentative sip of my shake. Oh yeah, that was the stuff.

"Just keep it on the down low about that shake okay? I like my job,"

"The brownie special is just a normal chocolate shake isn't it?" I grinned.

"Better appreciate it; I don't share my personal stash with everyone,"

"Thanks man."

And I did appreciate it. Courtney's yelling sounds uniquely like a seagull when you're high. I spent a day at the beach without ever leaving my couch.

-:-

I hate Courtney's boss. Keeping Courtney up late working, meant I got kept up late too and not in a good way.

Midnight coffee runs sucked.

"One espresso with a double shot and one frozen red bull smoothie," I slumped against the counter, rubbing my eyes.

"Wild night?" the familiar voice snapped me out of my thoughts.

"Are you always here?"

A fedora got pushed low over glinting eyes, "Seems like it," he shrugged, "People love me,"

I snorted.

"Oh really? Do you insult all of your customers?"

"Only the ones I like, I have great customer service. That'll be four dollars asshole," he went to make the drinks and I rolled my eyes as I pulled out my wallet.

-:-

"Why don't you wear a nametag?"

"Cuz they're stupid and I like to be mysterious. 'Sides I don't know your name either,"

He reached out and snatched the yellow post-it from my hand.

"So that's 3 black coffees, two caramel lattes, 5 assorted shots and a grasshopper shake? What're you going on a caffeine binge?"

"Study party,"

"Studying is not a party, what're you learning?"

I watched him move to make the drinks, my tired eyes resting on his ass. Those jeans were nice and snug.

"I'm a criminology major,"

"Cool, I'm a literature major, minor in psych,"

"Let me guess, you have a literary name,"

He smirked, "You'll never guess it."

"Huck Finn? Atticus Finch?"

"Not even close."

When he gave me two cardboard trays full of cups and told me the outrageous total, I decided to be nice and pay with my credit card.

-:-

"What'll it be today Duncan?"

"Why don't you guess Tom Sawyer?"

"Wrong," he closed his eyes and put his fingers to his temples as if in a trance, "I foresee an agitated girl fiend who will not rest until she gets a caramel latte and a very cute punk who is in desperate need of liquor but lacking that will take a black coffee," he smirked at my blush.

"Just get me the order,"

"As you wish cutie," he winked and walked away.

I looked outside at Courtney who for once wasn't on her phone, seeing as it was a weekend. We were going on a date to the zoo. I was dreading it, how girly was a zoo? I'd rather see lions maul gazelles on TV not watch them sleep like house cats in cages.

"So Blessed Ambrosia is playing tonight at the Attic, you going?" the barista tilted his head towards the speakers where the music of a local metal band was blasting. I smiled.

"Really? I'll be there!" the band was awesome.

"Cool, me too. Keep an eye out for you."

Me and Courtney went to a classical guitar show that night. I was only mildly disappointed. Cuz Blessed Ambrosia put on a good show, no other reason. Ahem.

-:-

"Mr. Darcy?"

"No."

"Boo Radley?"

"No."

"Harry Potter?"

"I was born before that series came out doofus."

"Tell me your name!"

"That'll be $4.50 Duncan and have a muffin on the house, dealing with a harpy is hungry work."

"Heh, thanks man."

"No probs, think Shakespeare, hint hint."

"Fine Romeo."

-:-

"I think you might be addicted to caffeine dude,"

"What makes ya say that Tybalt?"

He shook his head, "Duncan, this is the second time you've been here today."

I rolled my eyes, "This morning was the mandatory coffee run; now I'm just here of my own free will."

The Asian smiled smugly, "Enjoy my company that much huh?"

I blushed, "No! I'm addicted to caffeine, now give me my coffee!"

-:-

"What the Hell?"

I looked over at Courtney in confusion, licking a bit of muffin off my lips. She was staring at her mug in outrage.

"Why is the word 'bitch' written on the side of my mug?"

-:-

"Not funny man," I said, biting my lip to hold back my chuckles.

The white-haired Asian grinned, "It was kinda funny."

"A little funny," I admitted, taking my cup, "Lysander?"

He just rolled his eyes and walked away.

I left the shop before creasing my brow and looking at my cup in curiosity.

'Hamlet is the last hint I'm giving you dimwit.' Was written on the side.

-:-

I smiled to myself as I sat in the early morning light outside _Mugs not Drugs, _waiting for a certain Asian to open the shop. He always worked the morning shift on Fridays.

I couldn't believe I knew his schedule by now. Though that wasn't surprising considering it had been…three months already? Dang, three months of getting coffee almost every day. Maybe I really would end up addicted to caffeine.

"Whatcha doin' down there?"

I looked up and my smile grew. It was the first time I had ever seen him look perplexed.

"I couldn't sleep,"

He raised a brow, "So you decided to be a creeper?"

I smirked, "I broke up with the girl fiend."

I saw a small spark in his eyes though I knew he'd deny it if I pointed it out.

"Really now?" he crouched beside me, "About time."

"I thought you'd like that," I glared playfully and he coughed, reaching up to push his hat lower over his forehead.

"What makes ya think I care?" he looked at the sidewalk.

"Horatio," I put a hand on his knee and he blinked but slowly smiled.

"Finally, how'd you guess?"

"I'd kill your parents if they named you Hamlet, Laertes or Claudius."

"Me too," he put his hand over mine and smirked.

"So no latte, what can I get for you?"

"A brownie special and a shot of dinner and a movie."

888

This is dedicated to A.B./ShadowLexis who rocks my socks. Sorry to any Courtney lovers but I will never be able to write her in a good light, she will always be a bitch to me.

I hope you enjoyed this ridiculousness. Happy reading!


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